I dislike having to deal with periods for many reasons.
1. I swell up
2. It flares my Lupus
3. I'm exhausted
4. I can hardly eat
5. I gain water weight
I have a feeling my period is fixing to start now because it's hard for me to exercise and I tend to sleep longer. My body is very tender to touch and I can move around like I used to. My sleep schedule is totally messed up because of how sick I feel. I just want this flare up to be over with already 🙄🤢😷
The other night was pretty scary to me. I was telling my mom how when I was asleep I thought she was saying my name but whenever I sat up she wasn't there. Then a few minutes later all I heard was "Wake up" and as soon as I heard that I popped up so fast. I told my mother it was around midnight when that happened and she told next time that happens wake up and say "yes lord, im here." She told me that is the time God talks to you and that means you have a blessing coming your way. After awhile around 4 I went to the bathroom and when I look into my mom room there was a dark shadow above her head and it scared me so I ran back to my room and started praying for my mother.
Those things haven't happened to me since my aunt died two summers ago. Looks like I need to start reading my Bible a lot more than I am now because if I have a blessing coming my way I sure do want to accept it.
Today is Friday, the last day of my workouts and I decided to do cardio (Stupid mistake). My legs are burning 🔥 and my body is extremely exhausted and in pain 😭. A nice salt bubble bath will be my bestfriend for the next few days until I can gain the engery and the pain is not as hurtful from the past workout sessions.
Getting up early every morning has been hard for me. It finally caught up to me yesterday when I could barely walk around the store with my mom and drive around town as well. I took me a nap as soon as I finish eating my breakfast and watched the rest of the wnba game.
Knowing my body is in pain tells me the exercises are working. That's a great feeling to me even though it makes things hard for me to do stuff, I still feel like I have accomplished my fears 👌🏽
So I had this wig in my room I had bought during the school year last year but didn't wear it for long because I was too sick and my hair was falling out.
Yesterday, my mother and I went to our hairstylist so that he could tighten her hair and take some layers out of my hair. Little did we know he was going to do it and do my hair at the same time. I thought it was funny because I only went there to watch my mom get her hair done but I ended up getting mine done as well and I also took over her appointment 😂
After he finished with my hair I felt like a new person. I started to fantasized about what I would look like when I dressed up and put my makeup and totally got happy. 💄💄 I know it's weird to having a weave wig make me feel like a new person rather than me just being me and changing the way I do things.
I started taking two Cellcept twice daily on Sunday instead of just one and I can feel the effect of the medication. I hate going up on my medications because there is always a side effect that appears out of nowhere.. Recently, having diarrhea seems to be the main side effect I am always getting. Every now and then I will feel nauseated or I will have some type of pain but diarrhea is the main one.
The Nephrologist think Cellcept will help save the 20% of my kidneys that are currently working and I hope it can save them as well but I believe being on dialysis will be the best option for me. I don't feel the same as other people did when they were on dialysis but feeling tired was what I felt during my session.
Increasing medicine can be useful or it can be harmful, it all depends on what medication you are taking. I know this from experience and knowledge. If you need any help with this stuff you guys can always ask the doctor or me.
This is a new week with another morning full of exercises. I had my alarm set for 5 o'clock this morning but when it went off I didn't get up, I just laid in the bed and turned it off. I thought to myself "maybe I should workout tonight instead of this morning since I am feeling nauseated and my stomach is hurting" then I went back to sleep. About two hours went by and I decided to get up and do my exercises. I dream about it and changed my mind because giving up was not a option for me anymore. Always remember to keep going and never give up! Stay fighting for yourself because you never know who is watching you fight and want to be like you. You are a inspiration to a little girl out there and you don't even know it. So, keep fighting and NEVER EVER give up!
I've been waking up early in the morning just to workout and it has been paying off. My body feels stronger and I am having more energy. I feel confident in myself to be who I used to be but even better. Some mornings are rougher than others but I push through it because I am strong and not a quitter. ✊🏽 I thank God every day for allowing me to get up every morning and workout with no complaints. It is because of him that keeps me going. Today I only did a few exercises this morning and I will do more later when I wake up again. Also, today is my twin little brothers birthday 💕 they are finally 18 years old 🔞 they too push me to keep going and never give up because they strive to be the best and I also strive to be my best.
Let go and let God. I can write a whole post on stress but I am not going to do it.
Stress can trigger my Lupus and cause it to flare up. Lately, I've been stressing out because my mom is stressed. We are struggling but no one can see it. She is constantly doing things for others who won't do things for her. I wish I could take all the stress away from her and handle it on my own but that's not going to happen.
I often deal with stress by working out and letting everything go. This morning was a great morning to let everything go. My body is feeling more powerful than before.
The only advice I can give you is find something that you can come to peace with and use it as a tool. The other thing is what I had said before, "Let go and let God."
As we continue to be faithful, God loves continues to grow. Each year God's faithfulness multiples.
He has been blessing me and moving mountains. I continue to belive in his power for thou is the my healer.
Food, I love you. I eat you every day and try my best to eat you almost every hour of the day and night. But why do you have to be so bad for me. You cannot be salty, dry, too much sugar. All you need to be is full of protein to help me with my kidneys. Be tasteful for me to eat and help out with the workout. A good diet while exercising will make my weight come off faster. I understand being on a lot of steroids will cause me to eat more and have a appetite like a elephant.
This is our new season food. It's time for us to change. My eating habits will NOT be a problem anymore! If I eat healthy I will feel healthier.
I do not want to do this but I HAVE to do it. New week, New start, New me. 💪🏼